Friday, April 28, 2006

Good news ladies

Male pill won't affect fertility
Clara Pirani, Medical reporter
April 29, 2006
A CONTRACEPTIVE pill that stops men producing sperm may soon be available, after research proved the treatment does not affect men's fertility in the long term.
A review of studies involving 1500 men aged 18 to 51 found the men's sperm levels returned to normal three to four months after they stopped taking the contraceptive.
"The male contraceptive is much more reliable than condoms and I believe in time it will be shown to be as effective as the female oral contraceptive," said lead researcher Peter Liu, from the Anzac Research Institute at the University of Sydney.
Dr Liu and a team from the Los Angeles Biomedical Research Institute examined 30 studies that involved men taking a contraceptive pill, injection or patch.
The male contraceptives use the hormone androgen, or a mixture of androgen and progestogen combinations of hormones to switch off sperm production, the same way as the female contraceptive pill suppresses ovulation.
The results, published in the medical journal The Lancet, showed the contraceptive was reversible and safe, causing no serious side effects.
"Family planning is a shared responsibility and these findings pave the way for new contraceptive drugs that allow men to share that responsibility," Dr Liu said.
Two large trials are under way in China and Europe to confirm the preliminary findings.
"We still need to work out what the best form of formulation is, whether it's a pill, patch or injection," Dr Liu said. "But it will be a better alternative than the current methods of male contraception that include condoms, withdrawal or vasectomy which are either not very reliable or easily reversible."

Tuesday, April 25, 2006


Cammy Moment  of the week ,

Cammy was playing and running around after a long nap from her Granny’s house, and she looked up at me and remembered something, like “oh! Yeah I mean to show you mommy!” and then worked hard to pull off her socks and show me her freshly painted ruby red toe nails. No matter I told my mom and granny only light colors, she was soo pleased I didn’t take it off.

Jerry moment of the week,

I’d really rather not say, it would sound like bragging and that is so un-lady like.

Friday, April 21, 2006

frantically calm

So yesterday was a long day. My girl was released from the hospital and is now parked rather uncomfortably on my chase. My house isn’t exactly suited for surgery recovery, with toddlers and dogs abound,  but at least we love her, and I can make sure she doesn’t do anything stupid like go to dinner and a movie four days after surgery. EXACTLY. You know people who stress about being a burden and keep going over and over how they don’t want to be a burden, she’s one of those people. Ever notice how that’s more burdensome, and annoying than if they would just let you help them? Yeah.

My whole house is filled with tired stressed people. My husband is stressed and I don’t know how to help him, lately I frustrate him, while he has been nothing but wonderful to and for me. Its times like this when I just want to do something really nice to/for him. If I could afford a massage for him, I’d call our personal masseuse, and have her work him over for an hour. But alas. I know there are a few things I need to woman-up about so I think I’m gonna handle that and see if that don’t help the situation.  

Cammy wants to spend a bunch of time with me and I want to spend it with her too. Tomorrow I think we are gonna work as cheaply as we can in the yard. She loves the outside, and maybe we can get some park time in too. I need to renew my garden membership, I used to go there and just walk. I miss that. In the mean time, I am blessed and have a good life. Something positive – Jerry makes me laugh even when I’m mad and while that makes me mad at the split second it happens I am secretly happy about it.

The week is almost over, I used WAY Too much vacation time this month–it is possible I should have worked on my birthday (ARGH!!!) and good Friday (sorry Lord), but I didn’t so that is all on me, I’ll lament the loss of those days in December I’m sure. I really, really wish I could take Cammy to get pictures done, but money is funny but wait a second… I’m a photographer, so I think I’ll take her out to do some photos, I think I’ll also invest in some lights and backdrops in the next few months so I can do it myself, and maybe make some extra money shooting peoples children and pets. Now THERE is an idea! I need to study up on wedding shots I have a wedding next weekend, and A baby shower. We’ll see how it goes. And I need to update my photography website, I’ve decided to junk the poetry site and focus on photography, It was just too hard to try and get that poetry idea off the ground alone. And St Louis’ poetry scene isn’t about the whole scene just YOUR scene, so I knew I wouldn’t find too much help there. Besides I love capturing peoples memories for them. Love being involved in such an intimate way. To be trusted to be the eyes, that is just a wondrous thing. Anyway I am getting back to work… Really I am.

honest things to ponder..

Women are like apples on trees.

The best ones are at the top of the tree.
Most men don't want to reach for the good ones because they are afraid of falling and getting hurt. Instead, they sometimes take the apples from the ground that aren't as good, but easy.
The apples at the top think something is wrong with them, when in reality, they're amazing. They just have to wait for the right man to come along, the one who is brave enough to climb all the way to the top of the tree.

Now Men....Men are like a fine wine.

They begin as grapes, and it's up to women to stomp the crap out of them until they turn into something acceptable to have dinner with.

Thursday, April 20, 2006

5 minutes with Raquita

5 minutes with Raquita (Queue is my alter-ego)
Mom- Wife and poet, not in any particular order today..

If money didn't matter what would you do with your life? Be a stay at home mom and teach once my children were in school. I’d have alotof kids, though and adopt and foster kids as well.

What's the biggest misconception about you? That I always have to be right, its not my fault that I am well amlost always right.

Beauty or brains? Brains is beautiful to me.

What is your weapon of choice? Samari sword, with proper training, a 9mm without proper training A proper slice/bullet will cut all that conversation stuff out quick.

Who was your first celebrity crush? My first one I remember was ralph from new edition,

What's your family's nickname for you? Ricki, apparently, like all my nicknames, I gave it to myself.

What is your most embarrassing guilty pleasure? I like ice cream a lot, like Icould eat it for every meal, Basic vanilla from breyers is the only store brand that does it for me, and rainbow sherbert preferably from Baskins Robins

What's the last book you've read? Smart couples finish rich (– I do sugguest you pick it up).

Name one thing that scares you? Failing my child.
What's the biggest mistake you've made? Sometimes I speak before thinking everything through, traits passed from my mother, I haven’t been ableto check that completely

Who would you cast to play you in a movie about you? Queen Latifah

If you ran for President of the United States, who would be your running mate? Oprah – the most powerful woman in america, she’d be perfect and shes gotthe bank roll.

Who is your favorite TV mom? Claire Huxtable, the Cosby show .

What's the fastest way to pick a fight with you? Be negative contiunosuly. It drives me crazy.

If you could tell one person to shut up, who would it be? Bush

Who would you die for? A lot of people, probably more than I would care to admit, because I know that list is way shorter if asked who would die for me.

Name one celebrity whom you would never procreate under any circumstances? Most rappers.

It would be an honor if some said my writing/poetry reminded them of_____________. Giovanni, Sanchez,

Name one sex act you would never perform if you were the opposite sex? Dirty Sanchez

Would you ever pose for Playgirl/Playboy? With the right body – sure

When was the last time you cried? At my uncle’s funeral

What's the greatest personal tragedy you've ever experienced? The death of St.Louis’ poetry scene.

Complete this sentence: By this time next year______________. I may be pregnant, working on remodeling the house and training another dog.

Wednesday, April 19, 2006

required classes

Tuesday, April 18, 2006

Tagged via Sarah - Top 10 hip hop albums

Top 10 hip hop albums (in no particular order)

Jay –Z the black album
Mos Def
Dr Dre – the cronic – I wasn’t a hip hop head and I had this album
Common – Be
Snoop – doggystyle best snoop album yet, so hot he keeps trying to copy it and keeps missing, you just get glimpses
DMX –its dark and hell is hot-he’s crazy but the CD was off the banger…
Outkast – southernplayalisticcadillacmuzik
Tupac – Me against the world tied with all eyes on me – I had them both – and both got yanked go figure.
*** will contiune once I have more time to think on it

top 5 artists

Jay Z is number one – there I said it and I meant it
4.Talib Quali
5. *** will start arguments so I’ma leave it blank – nah I’m pu tmy fifth up there – Eminem there I said it and I meant that s@#$!@!!  

Top 5 groups

2. tribe
3. the roots
4. Run DMC
5.tie – Fugees (aka Lauryn Hill)  and heavy D and the boys – for nostalgia sakes man – its like would I list SWV in the top R&B groups – yes I had all of their albums too…

just for mentionings sake
Loved -  Method Man, salt and pepa, I was a HUGE Queen Latifah fan, LL Cool j probably would hav emade top ten for me, even with his shirt on,  Common would have been number six for me, Will smith,Ice Cube  and Lil Kim would have made my top ten easy.

Taggin my hubby and Spoken.

Would you like a t-shirt?

last week was my birthday – it was a relatively quiet and simple day for me. Got up and took Jerry to work, and Took Cammy to have breakfast at my moms house and drop off some stuff to my mom to mail to my uncle Patrick in Iraq (who is now on his way home safe! yeah baby) visit with my Uncle Joe – home for the first time in years, (welcome home Uncle) and give Cammy a few minutes with her Granny’s. Then we went to the Zoo, and hung out at the Park, walked around the Jewel box, Ran up this hill covered in flowers, little posies or something like that, at least I like to think they were posies. We got to just hang out and for the very first time, I really, really envied stay at home moms. I got to thinking about all the day trips we could take and all the things I could show her and teach her and watch her learn it all. We could bike ride and spend mornings in the botanical gardens, and go tot all the cool places we never seen to find time for on the weekends, like the Magic House, Grant’s Farm, Purina Farms, the Science Center, the Butterfly House has a carousel in that same park not to mention all the butterflies, Botanical Garden which is like RIGHT OUT SIDE MY HOUSE!!! And they have a new children’s garden, then there is the Art Museum which is where Jerry and I met, Turtle Playground, History Museum, city Museum has World Aquarium now, and a circus that performs every day. Then there is Worldways Children’s Museum, she loves birds, so World Bird Sanctuary would be good, her dad would like Wild Canid Survival Center a wolf sanctuary. I really need to be more proactive in getting out of the house early and going to take advantage of the stuff that is right here for us. Even if I can’t say home with her – I can work on making the most of our time together. Making sure she can see everything and try everything. That’s what I remember most about being a kid, my mom was huge about making sure we saw everything and went everywhere. That we got the chance to see everything the world had to offer. Funny thing is though She made my world view bigger than hers and now Cammy’s will be bigger than mine I suppose. I hope that traveling to other countries and cultures will be old hat for her by the time she has a family of her own. So in an effort to get us to that, I think I’m gonna buy a kid trailer for a bike and use my dad and mom’s bikes to pull her around our neighborhood.
any who - Easter was sunday and we had a easter egg hunt in the yard at my moms house, the kids played Musical chairs and it was a great time. Cammy hung out with her cousin Pierre, and he is just a wonderful kid, I love love love him. he's exactly the kind of big brother like person I'm so glad Cammy has. My friend spoken had surgery yesterday - we've been running a round getting preped for that as well, so we been a little busy, but the surgery went well thankfully and she'll be posting more often cause she'll be at my house once released from the hospital. Expect more posts about that as our house gets smaller and smaller and smaller. Sheba is coming in May and so is Marc Marcel, so it will certianly be interesting. We are also car shopping for spoken and apartment hunting, wish us luck. We also went to the Floetry concert. it was a good show, we got to hang with Nat after, I got to cook for her which was nice, grilled her some salmon on the fly- (that is another post about how hard it is to get fresh slamon anywhere in St.Louis after 8 p.m) next time though she gonna have to come to the house... So that is always fun seeing them, although the last few times, Marsh hasn't felt too well after the show, I hope she gets better real soon.
anyway - everything has been everything. Lafe is moving along, Jerry and I have been working it out. Making it work - being safe in each other, so i'll post more as things progress,a nd I remember all the things i have to say.

Tuesday, April 11, 2006

My Birthday Chicken

Monday, April 10, 2006

Rocky and Bullwinke love

Hey all.. I’ve had a pretty basic weekend. We did the cake and ice cream thing and we are getting ready for Easter and the Floetry concert. My Girlfriend is having surgery promptly after all of that, and then my grandmother sometime after that so now we have to find Early childhood development schooling for Cammy, at least a few days a week, so we got a lot going on however I wanted to take some time out to voice my displeasure over this article about Christians and their tolerance.
The reason I bring this up is this was voice and argued about over the weekend – with the most brainless argument – by my brother in law – who would freak if he knew I was posting about him – so lets call him Peet.
This article and Peet both walk around the same lines. But I firmly believe that this article and people whom hold beliefs along these line are decidedly acting in a non Christian way. I’m getting ahead of my self. Let me move back.
This whole thing started when we were talking about seeing Brokeback Mountain. He was saying he didn’t want to see it, no matter how well made or good a movie, those people didn’t exist – ect, he didn’t want to see “those people” and they can’t really be in love ect. Well, seeing as his brother in law –My brother, previously mentioned in this blog as Cammy’s favorite, and my biggest pain in the butt sibling – is gay and very out and living with his boyfriend who has been in our family as long as Peet has, this made me a bit concerned.
“So what you are saying Peet, is that Rocky and Bullwinkle don’t love each other? That they go through hell and high water to be together and accept additional racisms in addition to being young black men.”
“its not the same for Rocky – cause he’s family” This sentence was said with lots of stutter and disbelief that I even put it out there. But you guys know me, I ain’t never scared to put it out there. So we went back and forth with him dancing around the issue before my husband ticked me off by telling me to let the conversation drop.
Then I read this article about how people are suing for the right to be intolerant.
You want it to be legal for you to make other people uncomfortable because they choose to live a life you are uncomfortable with for yourself? I just can't grasp how that is supposed to be the christian way of living, Jesus never forced himself on anyone - so why as christians do so many beleive that this would be Jesus's way? I just can't grab a hold of this thought process people, I got so much more to say on this one but its gonna have to wait a little bit.

Thursday, April 06, 2006

Don't try to play me out...

Cammy and I had a pretty good night last night. We had corn on the cob- a Classic Cammy Favorite dinner food. Jerry went to see V for Vendetta She’s still having nightmares – at least I think she is – she wakes up frantic and upset calling either me or her Daddy, but promptly goes back to sleep once she gets a little cuddle or a few strokes on her head and a hug. Last night I had to sing to her (how that could put her back to sleep I’ll never know), I always pray over her when she wakes up upset. We pray at night before bed time, she says a hearty “A-MEN!!” when we get done. Every night, when she gets so upset I worry that we moved her out of our room too soon.   Last night I found myself sitting on her floor with my hand on her tummy, her holding my finger just talking a little bit. I wonder if she feels my stress, and if I am contributing to her discomfort. I worry if we are making the right decisions for her..
Honestly folks, my stress levels are probably dangerously high, and I promised myself I wasn’t gonna do the whole shutting down thing I normally do when I get stress, I was gonna fight through it and resolve all the issues, I also need to learn to let Jerry handle what he can – not just what I can’t, if that makes any sense. I’ve got a tension headache, Jerry’s got a migraine, and Cammy well she’s cute as ever.

My Mom’s birthday is today – Happy Birthday Mommy! She’s thirty two today which means she was three when she had me. Go figure. She got her present which she loved, thankfully. And that means I’m one birthday down and a zillion to go. April is a busy month for giving birth. Here’s to hoping I can avoid it in the future.

Monday, April 03, 2006

For the love of Cammy...

Today I am going to start doing exactly what I said I was going to do. Blog about my daughter. I said I wanted to journal better about her growing and changing – because I don’t scrap as much as I would like and my photos are coming fewer and farther in between – yes I know that means just a hundred pictures at a time, rather than thousands, but hey – she’s my first born. I came to this thought process as Jerry and I were discussing the practicality of an additional child (there really isn’t much). We were talking about the difficulty Cammy has shown to be imminent should a sibling be in her near future. Cammy has developed a serious mommy attachment. I kinda saw this coming especially when Jerry went to Japan, and no matter how I asked him to call home and talk to her – he tended to forget or call to late to catch her before bed time.  Granted the time difference is thirteen hours but hey – I don’t ask for much, but he has been decidedly more male lately so I will take what I can get. Anyway – She is seriously against sharing mommy with anybody. Shes become a very anti morning child, very upset about my absence when she wakes in the morning, usually she is greeting by her caregiver and she’s happy about it, not lately though. However there are two ways to guarantee genuine tears from The Camster as she is lovingly referred to as, and that is
  1. Comb her hair- its like you set her up for life imprisonment at age two

  2. Hug the mommy.
That’s right, just hug me, don’t even have to bother with removing me from the room. Just a hug will do it. She gets this very cautious look on her face when her daddy leans on my shoulder during T.V. like – you are gonna make her leave.  Screaming Cammy is one of my least favorite Cammy’s so – don’t touch me people, no matter how bad I look like I could use a hug.

Hope you get over that before I forget too many birth control pills kid, I don’t do the morning after pill, and while I’m pro choice – I am pro life so its safe to assume one day if your pops and I keep practicing one day we gonna fail that 99.56% accuracy I keep reading on the side of that Ovcon 35 box. We’ll see. I guess we’ll just see….

The inner struggle

I feel a lot lately, especially since Jerry got back. I feel a bit out of control. I want to take control of my house but I can’t seem to grab it all. As I tried to explain to him, Cammy and I had just hit a cycle, a rhythm when he got back, and now I feel like I’m losing it. On all levels, I can’t keep the house clean, can’t keep us all fed, can’t (fill in the blank here) well. And I have become snippy about it. I did miss Jerry terribly while he was away, as many of you can attest to but now that he’s back there are individual moments I wish I could ship back to Japan. Point In Case :Setting: In the middle of what ever I was doing, lets say working on the non profit web site, or friends bio or anything to that effect which would require me to be on a Computer  while Jerry is on the other end of house probably doing something wonderful –like laundry – cause he does that and I know how lucky I am that he does so just for Jerry points let put him at just changing a load of laundry.He comes up the stairs and finds Cammy knee deep in a dirty diaper.

Jerry : You wanna change Cammy?
Inner Quita: Now that is the dumb ass question of the millennium
Quita: No.
Jerry : You sure? She needs to be changed?
Inner Quita: You are right there, you found the dirty diaper that one is on you.
Quita: Sweetie, I’m kinda in the middle of something can you handle it?
Jerry : Sure. (picking up Cammy coming to the couch and putting her down and starting to remove diaper)  Hey – can you go grab me a diaper?
Inner Quita: So rather than stopping to change her – you want me to stop to be pit crew captain?
Quita: I, wait, sure.
Jerry : How about some wipes too?
Inner Quita: According to my calculations, normally one would prepare for the task before you sit down to complete it, maybe grab a wipe and a diaper before you take off the dirty one.
Quita: No problem.
Jerry : I think she wants some juice, You want so juice Cammy?

Cammy: JUUUICEE!!!
Inner Quita: She’s two she always wants juice?!
Quita: Yeah, okay Juice too.
Inner Quita: For all of this I should have just changed the #$%&!! diaper myself.
Jerry : there we go all changed - Inner Quita: I feel like the diaper intern

Quita: Okay.
Jerry : hey I’m sore all over my neck – I’ve had a low grade headache for  a while now?
Inner Quita: bet he wants me to rub his neck .
Quita: The Did you take some Advil or Orudus? Jerry : No. Is it in the cabinet in the bathroom?
Inner Quita: Normally.
Quita: I don’t know.
Jerry : Can you check and bring me a couple?
Inner Quita: Can anybody see me doing anything?
Quita: sure. You want water?

Jerry: Thank you baby. Can you rub on me for a little while? Only if you feel like it.
Inner Quita: Thanks - Saw that coming a mile a way.

Quita: Sure thing baby.

Jerry: Only not right there – over here and you gotta push harder cause you got weak fingers and you won’t hit it, but that’s too hard and

Quita: Okay – I quit, I give.

Jerry: Thanks sweetie I appreciate it.

Inner Quita: How can you appreciate a massage you had to dictate and direct like low grade porn? And how is it I’m still not doing what I started doing before the diaper?