Thursday, April 06, 2006

Don't try to play me out...

Cammy and I had a pretty good night last night. We had corn on the cob- a Classic Cammy Favorite dinner food. Jerry went to see V for Vendetta She’s still having nightmares – at least I think she is – she wakes up frantic and upset calling either me or her Daddy, but promptly goes back to sleep once she gets a little cuddle or a few strokes on her head and a hug. Last night I had to sing to her (how that could put her back to sleep I’ll never know), I always pray over her when she wakes up upset. We pray at night before bed time, she says a hearty “A-MEN!!” when we get done. Every night, when she gets so upset I worry that we moved her out of our room too soon.   Last night I found myself sitting on her floor with my hand on her tummy, her holding my finger just talking a little bit. I wonder if she feels my stress, and if I am contributing to her discomfort. I worry if we are making the right decisions for her..
Honestly folks, my stress levels are probably dangerously high, and I promised myself I wasn’t gonna do the whole shutting down thing I normally do when I get stress, I was gonna fight through it and resolve all the issues, I also need to learn to let Jerry handle what he can – not just what I can’t, if that makes any sense. I’ve got a tension headache, Jerry’s got a migraine, and Cammy well she’s cute as ever.

My Mom’s birthday is today – Happy Birthday Mommy! She’s thirty two today which means she was three when she had me. Go figure. She got her present which she loved, thankfully. And that means I’m one birthday down and a zillion to go. April is a busy month for giving birth. Here’s to hoping I can avoid it in the future.


Blogger Aeshema the Fury said...

We are living a stressful life as we have a lot of different things on our plate. We act out or stress in different ways. I wonder what it is that wakes her up so much at night. She is a very active dreamer and I dont remember her having this many nightmares before I left. Shes very much Mommy-Centric Lately. I think what happens with us is that one of us tries to do everything and then gets burned out and the other tries to do everything. We're still learning how to share the burden, something we arent great at, but we're getting better.


3:19 PM  
Anonymous chelle said...

Our toddler gets unsettled at times too, it always seems to be when I am stressed. It fades though...I hope you find a release for your stress!! Take care

2:36 PM  
Anonymous Clare said...

Just want to let you know I haven't checked back for awhile, but I really enjoy your writing. It makes me laugh, and think, and is easy and flowing.Your voice sounds soothing in my head.
Clare in (but not from) Pa.

3:22 PM  
Blogger Queue said...

Thank you for the positive words hubby - I know we are in this together! and Chelle I love hearing your stories and knowing I am not alone!
Claire in but not from PA - Thank you so much for the kind words, Its nice to meet people who come by and visit and nice to know that this is having the desired effect- that I am reaching out and touching people in some way! Thank you! So pray tell- where are you from if not from PA?

4:15 PM  
Blogger CousinSarah said...

Its the apron strings ma. We feel like we have to do everything for the baby. Even when they try to help, we have "our way" that we think it should be done. It is hard to let them help sometimes, but it is harder to do it all alone. And yes, they feel our stress. :)

Happy Bday Queue's MOM!!!!!!!

10:29 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I know ,I am nto sure if I told you or not but we are not moving back right now. We might still be next summer but we both felt God calling us to stay here for another year. Then of course Sarah might be coming here now too! Queue you gotta come here if we stay too much longer and Sarah gets a job. We could Disney it!!!
Its hard when they are having a rough time sleeping. There is agreat book called...
"Sleeping Through the Night" by Jodi Mindell. Keep praying over that room too! :) Hang in there momma!

1:17 PM  
Blogger Titanium Girl said...

Hi! Thanks for linking to me. I really like your blog.
Did you take Cam to see V for Vendetta? I can see how it could scare a child - but I get really scared and that movie did not scare me at all (it had a happy ending). Now the Exorcist - that scares the hell out of me. Yikes!

Looking forward to reading all of your entries!


2:20 PM  
Blogger Copasetic Soul said...

when my daughter was younger, she could tell when things werent right
in the house...she would do things just to make her mother and i smile
or laugh. kids sense things...but dont get too stressed. whatever the
issue is, it will be worked out. be strong sis and keep the faith!

1:18 PM  

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