Wednesday, May 31, 2006

DaVinci, Death, love and choke holds

It has been an interesting few days. A co worker was upset; her child’s birthday has passed. He would have been eight or so, I don’t remember. He was a special needs child named Sam, he had a sweet smile for a little over four years. He makes me want to go home and hug my child. Because she is alive and healthy and happy and we are truly blessed.
The death of a child is something I cannot even begin to fathom. She – my coworker- apologized for being a bit of a hand full during her upset time. She wanted to be okay this year, wanted to be happy about the time she had with him, rather than sad that he was not here now. I told her to keep her apology, she had earned her tears and frustration. She has had to have strength I never want to know about, and if she needed to cry now, she was welcome to the tears.
My house is crowded. My brother is momentarily homeless and he slept on my couch, or rather displaced my invalid, non assertive friend onto the couch and fell asleep on the futon. The invalid is still there and we are now with poet, and Marc Marcel is in town. He’s always a welcome guest. My house seems like a one bedroom apartment for the first time in ages. My husband is hurting physically. Back pain and other strange aliments have plagued him. I wan to attribute it to the new running regimen he has started. He is already visually thinner even though he feels heavier to himself. Running makes one feel that way. But I am so proud of him and all the work he is doing.
So tonight, I am going to do laundry and clean our room. All by myself. Then I’m going to play with Cammy, and do some more scrapbooking. As I get that going I’m gonna start posting my layouts so you guys can see my geekiness in all of its splendor. I love to scrapbook and digital scrapping leaves less for Cammy to get into and turn into her newest play thing. I’m gonna start working on Jerry’s Japan scrapbook, he took enough pictures to warrant his own book all together, so I am going to make one for him and one for his friends back in Japan. I need to work on Cammy’s 1 year book (the year after her birthday, as well as our wedding book still isn’t finished and our family events book is still three years behind.) I got all the pictures and a lot of the journaling done. I just gotta get on the layouts. I’m thinking I may use some templates for some of the basic stuff then flesh it out with some hand made layouts and embellish some digital pages too.

Spoken’s Car dilemma is slowly coming to a close. Difficult car dealers and my friends complete lack of drive to pardon the expression – man up – is making this more difficult than it needs to be, at least for me. Spoken is my girl, nobody can believe I let a grown woman move into my house – however temporary – with me and my husband and kid. But I did, I had my reasons and I’d do it again if it meant she would have that surgery she needed. Spoken her self is a quandary to me. People typically – in my experience -don’t like her on first meeting, cause she can be brash. My family particularly thought she was such the pain. And she does that I believe as a defense thing. I got the impression she feels out of place in family gatherings and responds to all families the way she responds to hers. And my family as F*cked up as we are, they are great, I love them all and they are more welcome in my home than the poets who she (spoken) feels more comfortable with. She has built a family in poets and artists, I belong to that family, but they are not my family. You know My Family. Those people will be there when poets and artists move and disappear and stop calling cause I told them the truth, ect. While my family is mine, and I can’t walk away from them and I look forward to loving them through the truth. Funny though she was never brash with me, and I think if she was just less defensive about being, just being, she might be better, feel better in general. Sometimes she’s exactly what I expect then other times I’m like Where did she go cause you can’t be the same person. For instance the other day she was a tad out of line with Jerry and It had taken until today for me to be alright about it – but if she had that same Umph right now with Josh the stupid car dealer guy and his boss Jeremy I would be better able to understand why she is - but she gets the waif thing going on that totally drives me insane, she even gets all quiet on the phone – YO! SPEAK UP DAWG… I’ma need to hear you, fo’real. You don’t understand? Why are you saying that after the guy hangs up the phone, this is several thousands of dollars here, and a few years of a commitment and you have nothing to say out loud? She asked me, how would I feel if she turned all punk on me, I’m like um aren’t you already? She didn’t like that. Won’t like this section of post either. I think the difference is – she gets mad, hurt or put out and she gets quiet and pessimistic and woe is me. I get mad hurt or what ever and it makes me madder than a mug! I mean you will not just act like I’m gonna take what ever you dish out. Don’t tell me what is absolutely impossible. Like I don’t know what the hell you are taking about. And if I don’t know you better damn well be sure I’m gonna find out. I get woe is me, but man I don’t get to wallow long cause I got things to do. I gotta to get out of this situation. You know?
But I assume this is what friends do, cause this is what I’m doing. And I’ve probably hurt her feelings – the Cristina in me again I guess. I so started to use the Bambi line on somebody this week, but I bit my tongue. So I’m gonna let it go, she’s my girl anyway so what difference does it make?

The DaVinci Code makes for interesting conversation. I personally enjoyed the book immensely. Haven’t sent he movie, cause I liked the book so much, trying not to tarnish it. The idea that Christ had a relationship a real honest to goodness relationship – like man and woman relationship is something that would be just awesome to me. Make him more divine in my eyes. For me God’s greatness is in his humanity. But that is neither here nor there, another post for sure. But the reaction to this fictional book is just hysterical to me. A friend asked me this morning, what I thought – when I pointed out that the DaVinci code is a fictional book, he said
“yeah, yeah but its based on facts.”
“But it’s a fictional book. The author has said on many occasions he wrote it because his wife wanted him to, he just made it up.”
“But all of that about the Council of Nicea that’s true!”
“yes, but the book its self is a work of fiction.”
“You sound like a hard core Christian.”
Imagine my surprise, that my Christianity came into question and only one answer would do.
“I am a hard core Christian.”
“Like live and breath Jesus I mean”
“I do. Why does a fictional book get the right to make anyone question my faith?” there was no answer to that question.
He looked surprised. I thought that was funny. That being a poet, and being me, meant that I couldn’t be a real Christian. The funny thing is though for me, Jesus being married would explain so many things that just didn’t seem to click right for me I believe the bible is the inspired word of God. I believe man a fallible, and thus the bible is quite possibly not untampered with. How ever if one is to put faith into a religion and believe a God, my God created heaven and earth, why would you have such trouble believing that a 66 chapter book would be so hard?
In a December article in The National Review, David Klinhoffer stated, “If I were a Christian…I think I would find it a little disturbing that some fellow Christians do in fact view this novel as a threat to their faith.” He adds the insight, “If the professional educators were doing their job, any believing Catholic past elementary-school age would know that Brown’s book is a total falsehood.” But why has it ever been viewed as more than just entertainment? That is what is most disturbing to me, not just by Christians but by non Christians looking to say Ha! Everything you believe in is fake! Why is that the goal?

I’ve got to get back to work, but I’d love to hear from you guys on this…

Thursday, May 25, 2006

Hunky Husband fo ya!

Originally uploaded by raquita.
My hunky hubby is not shy he's just silly, so here is a picture of my sexy hunk of lovin...

We are still here

Originally uploaded by raquita.
See the thing is, people are reading old posts and leaving comments, so that means I’m slacking and now I’m back.
Things are going better – Thank you all for the well wishes and support over the last few weeks. Life has been hectic, but Jerry and I are holding it together. He’s holding me together and I am forever grateful for that.

Cammy is, still, quite the light in our house. Last weekend, we went to Columbia MO for more Sesame Street live, to meet my high school best friends Daughter whom I had never met, and to get caught up on my Godmother duties. Her daughter Brandi who is eight is my only Godchild. I used to purchase things for her and keep them around the house since I never see her. They don’t live far enough away for the distance to be a real issue, its honestly just a convenient one. Okay maybe they do, Columbia to St. Louis isn’t like driving to south county, but I like to think I can get out to see her more often. Her second daughter who I had never met is almost three and quite the fire cracker, and totally different from Brandi when she was that age. She’s a powerful little personality, Her and Cammy got along famously. Hanging out with Candace gave me the opportiuity to remember why we were friends in the first place. She and I connect like Spoken and I do. Like no matter how long its been we just pick right up and keep going. As much as I hate that part I’ve learned to just accept it for what it is. Not many people can come back into your life and be able to pick up right where you left off and that is a blessing in itself.
I rented a Pontiac Vibe for the trip, and loved that little car. Hopefully, we’ll find one once second car time becomes more imminent that it already is. Great gas mileage and cute and roomy. It’s a perfect second car for out little family.
We also met one of Jerry’s cousins, they are moving to St. Louis from Michigan and Jerry is the only family they have here. They are a wonderful couple. The Cousin is commuting from Michigan for now, and the fiancé is starting her job here this week, no kids, but they are great, and I’m really glad we have met them. Jerry and his cousin were both kinda nervous but got along great, they came over for barbeque. We are gonna see a lot of them both I hope, her while he is out of town – she’s a Grey head too! And him when he gets here permanently.
We are working on having the wall fixed in our tenants apartment, he’s got water damage on one wall, and we are concerned about the possibility of mold in that wall, and the guy who came out advised us FIVE THOUSAND dollars to fix it. My sister was like “Yo! You’re a Slum Lord!” I may have to remain a slum lord for a little while longer, cause I ain’t got five grand today. I’ll be praying on that one, any of you praying moms out there if you got a spare prayer laying around, I’d love it if you’d use it on this one.
We are also running the possibility of renovating the house into a single family unit. We love our tenant, but man we are smashed into that space, and I would love to stretch out. We would of course miss his rent but we could live with out it. I say that now, but around the first…
Any who, I made Chicken Marsala last night– it’s a time consuming recipe better done on the weekend rather than during the week, and it went over really well. Jerry loves it, I finally put the actually recipe in my binder of greatness. I am going to register for my pastry class this weekend. And I need to start buying the supplies for my class, I need pastry bags, bowls, all kinds of cool fun stuff. Maybe I can get an airbrush too.
STILL WORKING ON THE BIKE THING. Its so frustrating when you want to be active and the forces conspire against you. I’m gonna have to bite the bullet and make this happen one way or another.

Thursday, May 18, 2006

Wednesday, May 17, 2006

tagged by G

I AM: dying to move – my body, my home, my mouth , my mind. I need to move .
I WANT: tons of liposuction and a winning powerball ticket with all the right numbers for at least 100 mil.

I WISH: I could get it together, and keep it that way.

I HATE:when I feel this way.

I MISS: my 22 year old body – shoot any body I had before 180 lbs
I HEAR: Kem’s song on my neighbors radio
I WONDER: if cooked rice will hurt ducks

I REGRET: not doing better in college
I AM NOT: as focused as I should be
I DANCE: with Cammy all the time, but not enough with her father
I SING: very badly but do it anyway
I CRY: when I have to – Greys anatomy not included
I AM NOT ALWAYS: this moody,normally I am a pillar of optimism.
I MAKE WITH MY HANDS: anything. I can make anything
I WRITE: enough not to go crazy, not enough to stay sane
I CONFUSE: myself
I NEED: peace
I SHOULD: be easy
I START: bytching before I know its happening, then I try and stop it
I FINISH: as much as I can. Not enough thoughts though
I TAG: Jerry, and Spoken, and Copo, and you!

Tuesday, May 16, 2006

Catching up

The more things change the more they stay the same.

I got that library card, and we’ve been a hand full of times, we are hoping to go at least twice a week. She likes it there, I like it there, hopefully Jerry will like it there and we can all get some inexpensive out of the house time.

Still working on this whole bike thing. We got one bike, we gotta get the other one and the trailer and then we’ll be rollin’. We did make cookies, my kid is so very involved she poured everything. Helped with every action, even cracking the eggs. I love doing that with her. She was so excited, and likes watching the paddle mix the dough. I did not get to my moms house, and she was highly disappointed. You ever been so drained that getting in the car to go seemed like climbing a mountain? That was me on Sunday. And my bad mood makes everybody in my house moody. Cammy was a raging toddler most of the day. Cooking was one of the few high points to the day. I wanted to scrapbook, that didn’t happen but I pledge to get caught up soon on the scrapbooking, really.

Now I have been thinking tons about school for Cammy. I think its time. She needs to get out of the house more often. As most of you know, she is kept in our home by my Grandmother. Btu my granny isn’t focused on Cammy, and making the time that shes home most productive. She is involved with all her church groups and neighborhood groups, and helping her brother and caring for her mother, she doesn’t have the time or desire to do the things with Cammy I want her to be doing if she’s home. I am afraid that in all the good I feel was done in keeping her at home, she hasn’t had the opportunity to shine and grow. They don’t go out side often enough for me. The don’t go to the library, there are reading groups I want her to go to but no matter how many times I ask for her to be taken it just doesn’t happen. Part of me wants to home school her. But I am afraid that would be short changing her more. Her father and grandfather, they are easily genius enough to be able to give her what I want her to get from school. So we are looking into daycare learning centers as of right now, this weekend we have to make a list of where we want to go, make appointments and go. I don’t want to hurt anybody’s feelings, but she needs so much more than Grandma can give her now. My first responsibility is to my daughter. I cannot fail her.

Responsibility. Highly over rated. My stupid brother cousin and Uncle have pushed my hospitality too far. My grocery bill has been astronomical in recent months. And I learn that my free loading relatives have been hanging at my house like it’s a college dorm lounge. And I am gonna have to be the bad guy and re set my house, too many people, and spirits, and things there. Cammy hasn’t slept a full night in weeks. Jerry is grinding his teeth, I have constant headaches and we need more space than our house will allow. Some days I don’t know what we were thinking in buying this house. I know why, really, but some days I just don’t.

And I’ve been thinking about me. A lot lately. I got so many thing I’m trying to do. And I need to scale back, but I’m afraid that I don’t know how. I can’t find my way to the things that are most important to me, and the help I ask for just doesn’t come. Dana over at Mamalogues said at one of her other blogs (I am so jealous she gets paid to blog) any who she said;
used to feel inferior and measure myself against
other Christians, people I considered better than me, people who don’t think or
ever say VERY sassy things every now and then, who have never had too much to
drink, or who’ve never yelled at the guy who just cut in front of them in
traffic, even though he TOTALLY was what I called him. Thus, I was somewhat
intimidated by such a strong topic. In hindsight I realize that I held a crappy,
elitist view and that we’re all in this together. I really try hard to walk a
straight line and be the best example for my kids, but just like everyone else,
I fall, I slip up, I make mistakes. I’m the antithesis of perfection but I try
and I go WHOLE HOG.

And I so agree with that. My faith is at best mine and at worst weak. But I do have faith and I am afraid my life is trying to drag me away from my faith. And I’m not going with out a kicking screaming fight. Sometimes that’s what my headaches feel like, like I have been arguing with someone for hours.

Grey’s Anatomy

Three hours of OH.MY.GOD. I swear killing Denny just put a whole damper on my day. I’ll get to that later. I love Addison, and Derrick doesn’t deserve either of them – Meredith or Addison. Someone on another blog characterized the getting it on for Meredith and Derrick as "I'm mad, hurt, angry, what are we doing, you're still married, I'm seeing the doc and I'm not a whore, although maybe I should be knitting, this is seriously complicated" sex. That sounds about right to me. And I swear if she goes with Derrick, that will just make my stomach turn. The Vet is so perfect for her. And if sex in an empty exam room will make Mrs. I’mnotawhore rethink what he’s done, then maybe she should rethink a lot of stuff.
I love George in this set of epi’s – is whole speech to Meredith when he admits he ignored the fact that she would not reciprocate his feelings but he did it anyway, gave him a million cool points. I think Callie’s deceleration of love made him think about everything and the way his situation with Meredith played out, because he knows as much as he likes Callie, he doesn’t love her yet, and Meredith wasn’t even to the liking a whole lot stage. Kudos George.
Alex, I appreciate your humanity towards Issy, I know you love her man but you are still an arse of the highest order.
Christina, love how she can’t handle being human. Love how the Chief was life tough ta-ta’s kid, get used to it. Love how Burke sees her effort, and cannot fault her for faltering. Even though he knows he needs more in a mate and offers to let her go with out any bitterness or repercussions.
Webber's wife (Loretta Devine) is awesome. I love how she put him on front street about Meredith’s mom. She was like look here solider, fall in line or get discharged. I liked his niece too, her speech to him about having been loved was great. Her friends were great too. Love the parallel between chief and Mom Grey and McDreamy and Daughter Grey. Same thing different decade.
My husband asked what I thought about Denny and this is exactly what I told him.
I hate that Denny had to die. You know none of the characters has had a happy ending yet, and I thought we were due one - George didn't get Mer, Alex didn't get Issy , Mer didn't get Derrick, Addison didn't get Der – not really, Der didn't get Mer, Burke got Christina but that’s not a happy ending yet, Callie didn't get an I love you from George, the Nazi is on mommy track and The chief is on front street - no body is happy, and its never that nobody is happy, that's not real. In real life somebody is happy some time. But like George says Life just….. sucks. Somebody should be allowed to be happy. Just for a minute. And I needed it to be Issy and Denny. Shoot kill him in the next episode kill him as he walks out of the hospital on her arm just give us some happy ending - sometimes you just need some happy ending. Cause you know of all the love I had seen on that show, Issy and Denny seemed the most real, reminded me of how I love Jerry- with your whole heart. I would do anything, ANYTHING for that love feeling, I would lose my job and risk everything to have him feeling. So when he died I felt it in places I never want to hurt in for real, ever.

Anywho I’m gonna work and not lose my job.

Sunday, May 14, 2006

Strawberry Delights

Strawberry Delights
Originally uploaded by raquita.
We went strawberry picking this weekend, I got exactly whatI wanted formothers day, and I'm too tired to go and hang out with my mom and grand mother. i'm rebounding, slowly but I'm coming back. Thank you for all the great thoughts. I needed them - Looking forwardto Greys tonight -I'll post tomorrow...

Tuesday, May 09, 2006

Would you sleep with Bob Barker if the price was right?

My family is still imploding.

I’m not gonna dwell on that.

I am gonna take my kid to pick strawberries Saturday. I think we are gonna make it to the library tonight. We went yesterday. Maybe I’ll actually get a library card and well take some books home.  I’ve given into the fact that we are not going anywhere this June. Normally we make a trip, that’s not gonna happen. Maybe I’ll move that week of vacation to October and we can make Anguilla happen then. Maybe not.
I made cookies, Quad chocolate chip ones. And I want to make oatmeal tonight.

My job is hard today. And my bosses expectations while they should be attainable are so not today. I think big wigs are in the office, I don’t think that’s a good thing.

I am a little down because I kinda feel stuck in a cycle we can’t seem to break, and I’ve never had this difficulty before, and its driving me crazy.

I think I’m gonna make a list of books to pick up at the library. And spend a little while getting caught up on the things that are important to me. I really, really want to get my moms bike fixed and pick up that trailer for Cammy so we can start riding every night. I’m gonna have to make that happen no matter what. You ever know you need something to not go crazy? I need some physical activity and cycling is the only thing I can think of that won’t kill my knees and I can take the kid too.  

I know I’m a bit down in the dumps but I’ll rebound pretty quick. I’m sure things will all work out just he way they are supposed to.

Sunday, May 07, 2006

self expanitory, really...

[Overheard in New York] Oh, Now I Remember

Girl #1: Yeah, I know what you mean about whoreish action. One of my friends gave this guy head in a stairwell, like, five minutes after she met him!
Girl #2: THAT WAS ME.

--Laguardia HS

Overheard by: Amanda Clarence Fox

Friday, May 05, 2006

have a nice tall glasses of shutthef#ckup up

My co workers are psycho.

I’ve vented about them before so I’m not saying anything else, I’m gonna be the grown up but I would love to serve several nice tall glasses of shutthef#ckup up in here. But I have bigger fish to fry. My uncle who has recently finished serving his debt to society, again, has crossed the line with my moms and that just ain’t finna fly homie. He’s got a small problem with reality and after ten years away that’s to be expected but for real Society is his waitress and shes serving a nice warm plate of noonegivesadamn. And when this is all over he’s simply gonna wish he had just cut the grass like my moms asked. Cause fo real, I don’t know him, and he don’t know me, and I’m the only person who can forget shes my momma, and that usually only lasts as long as it takes for her to remember where she put the belt.

Got a party this weekend, I’ll be posting pictures…

Monday, May 01, 2006

Weddings and Anatomy

Hey Gang.

It has been a long span of moments since I last posted. I photographed a wedding. And I understand now why Photographers charge out the ARSE to take care to preserve memories. That smack is expensive, I spent four hundred dollars to make six, doesn’t sound right does it? Seventy bucks worth of batteries. SEVENTY DOLLARS. Flashes and cameras and backups cause you gonna go thru a couple sets of batteries in ten hours on non stop shooting. Six hundred photos – that I probably got two hundred fifty useable pictures and maybe forty real gems, and I still have to order a proof book for them and offer a album and all kinda stuff, and then I have to know if they liked the work, I’d hate for somebody to spend that kinda money and not like my work.
Few of the funnier moments during the wedding, The bride is afraid of bubbles. I like to use bubbles as filler and glitter to make pictures pretty and magical, give them that fantasy feeling. She was afraid of the bubbles…. How is a grown woman afraid of bubbles? The pastor, was clearly in a hurry and the wedding was delaying him from being somewhere – prolly a NBA playoff game or something, he was like hurry up and skip this – you don’t want to really light that unity candle do you? Do you? So you want to give you mom a flower… do that afterwards. Holla back ya’llz is married now!!

Grey’s Anatomy – BEST DANG SHOW ON TV!!!

Okay – if you all didn’t know. I love Grey’s Anatomy. Its my favorite show. My girl Spoken got me addicted. And she bought us (yes we co- own many items, should our friendship ever dissolve we’ll have to have divorce proceedings to get over who will get what.) the season one DVD. I haven’t watched the whole season one, but I’ve seen enough recap shows to know the deal, (but I’ve been watching season two pretty much from the get go)  to watch it all soon. Any who last night was a new Show and I’ll just tell you, it was AWESOME! Okay this is my take on the show, and I have decided if even one of you posts that you love this show and watch I’m gonna start leaving my dissertation on it weekly. And tell you – you should read what the writers have to say about the show – after new episodes they post their thoughts to a blog- see my list if you wanna read it.  

Okay here we go – Episode Blues for Sister Someone
Web site recap
Izzie grills George about the personal details of his life, Addison takes Alex to task about a sensitive case, and Burke feels the pressure when he treats his musical hero.

Okay. Just for back ground, I should tell you Spoken says I’m about as Brash and insensitive as Christine. So I’ll start with Burke. I love the twist of this line for him. You never see him this open and sincere and afraid, we got a little glimpse of it when he was trying to get Christine to move in with him and give up her apartment. But to really be afraid that he best wasn’t gonna be good enough, in this case, it was personal. He knew even with his best the chances were slim and to completely understand why that musician had to try, why he felt the way he felt, gives us such a glimpse into him. Watching him lose his idol on his table was moving, with the violin playing in the background.  And I love how accepting Christina was of the revelation that Burke wasn’t the genius she though the was, a genius yes, but of a different kind. And I can see how he could think she would be less than okay with that- did you hear her cutting up the vet saying he wasn’t a “real doctor”?  She is so driven to be the best. I’m very much like that. Ask Spoken. Even in fun stuff, I need to be the best, its why Jerry and I play poker. Cause I’m really good at poker. But I can accept you not being the best – and I find it endearing that burke was afraid she couldn’t and she rose to the occasion and did.  

Addison. I love her. At first I was like – mmmm bad wife, but now I get her. Took like two episodes and now I get her. Why do I love Addison, cause she is the one putting herself out there. Yes Mer gave the whole “Love me” speech, but, man, She FLEW ACROSS THE COUNTRY and took another job, made friends with the other woman, lives in a RV and walks the other woman’s dog at the crack of dawn and gets poison oak from it and keeps pluggin away.  She came to Seattle Grace to fight for her marriage- which I don’t think she can save – so her initial presence on the show was that of a woman at war. Fighting up hill. And she is great. She made a mistake, which I think was both parties fault, and I think they’re marriage was dead before she slept with her hubbys best friend (ouch- so not good) but being the one who made the MAJOR, major faux pas, she is doing something we never see on TV – she’s trying to honor her wedding vows and work it out. Now to get burned by the doofus intern who talks too much, (I’ll address his stupid arse later.)   that’s is just bad karma. I think she did the right thing, I think her medical decision was sound, she did what her patient asked her to do. For Alex to step over the bounds and tell the hubby, and for the wife to be like “you’ll live but you’re on your own. Oh, yeah you rock and thanks”  that’s just cold blooded. And I’d toss her out there and save my rep if I were Allison. But keeping Alex around is asking for trouble – they are gonna sleep together, they got that spark, its inevitable. Alex needs some counseling and to be barred from practicing medicine unless he gets a serious attitude adjustment. Sometimes the truth as you see it is necessary and sometimes its not- he just doesn’t hear that “not” part… I thought he was totally out of line, and when Allison finds out he got this started, its gonna be on. And I was really glad she and McDreamy got to have hot sex. She needed it, even if he was offering for all the wrong reasons. (anybody else notice that he came home and had shower sex with Addison, after watching Mer come out of another man’s shower wet and in his shirt? Anybody? Anybody?)

McDreamy. He’s turning into a jerk. And he had it coming. Cause he’s cheating both Mer and Addison. He’s cheating Addison cause he’s not really trying, he just doesn’t want to be the one who gave up on the marriage. When he left Manhattan she was the one who killed it by sleeping with the friend, so he’s being the bigger person and trying to make it work so he can say he “tried” and pick up with Mer once he’s given the required effort and pushed Addison away so much she can’t keep trying. He just assumes she’ll (Meredith)  still be available, which is why I LOVE the vet being tossed in to that mix. Between McSteamy, McVet, and McDreamy, Addison, and Meredith its gonna be some fireworks.   I love that he just assumes she slept with the Vet, although it looked incriminating, in his shirt fresh from a shower, and he deserves the pang he felt when he saw her, just a little Karma, it made him angry and he wanted to punish Mer for not staying as miserable as he his forcing himself to be so they can be together later, so he went home and screwed his wife, he wanted to be the man who caused the shower she was coming from, so he went home to cause SOMEBODY’s shower... And if that’s what it takes to give my girl Addison some good lovins – so be it.

Izzy, I love her for choosing Denny even if its against the rules. I adore George and Dr Bones together. I love her character, I got alotta her in me too. She is the most normal woman of color on a show like this on TV and she makes the little white girls uncomfortable cause she’s not like them. And I like that about her. She’s exactly who she is. She got flava. And she’s glad to have a regular good man. She can see the McDreamy in George, and she makes George see the McDreamy in himself, which is what a good woman does. She doesn’t need a McSteamy, McVet, or a McDreamy, she got a McGeorge, and a lot of women watching this show would be glad to get a McGeorge if they could.  
Anyway that is my rant for today. Tune in next week…